The Taper

Just a short update:

After countless frigid Saturday mornings, afternoons on the treadmill and dimly lit evening runs building a distance base, we're on our cool down leading up to the main event in about a week and a half.

The training we've all put in has been invaluable, leaving us experience dealing with chilly temperatures, battling blowing winds (in our 20 miler ten days ago) and fighting up and down hills on the W&OD trail, which I'm pretty sure I've seen about enough of. All the captains and coaches with Team in Training have done a massive job setting us on paths to success.

The remaining training almost seems like cheating with such comparably short distances. Still, I know my worn down body appreciates the brief lull to get fully geared up for Nashville on the 25th. Only 11 days away!

This Saturday we'll all join up for our last group run, a short jaunt compared to the last few weekends, of the spring TNT season before the first of the group heads to Tennessee on Thursday morning. We'll continue updating with thoughts from everyone as race day approaches.

The Mission

I received some sad news the other day, and it’s been on my mind. An acquaintance from college, my year, lost his battle to cancer and passed away this past weekend. A part of me feels uncomfortable writing this for many reasons. I can’t say I was good friends with him, but I ran across him throughout college as we had some mutual friends and he was always really nice to me and seemed like a really good friend to his friends I knew. I don’t think it is too appropriate for me to really get into any details of his battle due to the sensitivity of the terrible timing as this is all too fresh and recent for kids dealing with it right now. The circumstances of the whole situation has made me think a lot – obviously for him and his family, but a lot for my friends that were close to him. I can only imagine how they must feel, knowing the inevitable and trying to even cope with the loss of a great friend full of life at such a young age. Everything I’ve heard about him makes it worse – he was a really smart guy, a free spirit that wanted to always live in Australia and did so for a year after graduation, and most importantly, a good friend. I can’t particularly make any insightful comments or say anything to that effect, but I really hope my friends are doing alright.

This has also given me some perspective as to this cause that I have gotten myself involved in for Team In Training / Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. Everyone definitely knows someone affected and people’s lives and thoughts are impacted differently and to different levels of extent, and for some reason this one case has driven me to reflection. Honestly, and it is really weird for me to say but… hearing really sad stories every Saturday and receiving weekly emails about tragic cases of battles with cancer is tough and good to remind us of the cause, but it also makes you de-sensitized in a way. I know its awful to say, but its hard to continually sift through stories and comprehend them. And that can’t be a good thing, those stories mean so much to so many people, and affect other people who weren’t involved but have similar personal stories from their lives. Those stories were sad, no doubt about it, but I never really knew what to think while hearing those stories as I wasn’t directly affected growing up by cancer. Sure I knew and know of people who had family/friends affected, and yet, throughout this marathon training I haven’t really felt so attached to the cause. It was more so about me taking on a challenge and changing my habits training for this marathon. I knew the LLS cause was great and wanted to raise money for the organization in honor of people that I know who have dealt with someone affected their whole lives. Maybe that was in the back of my mind, but I never had a clear perspective of the greater purpose of the organization and its goal of the Team In Training program.

It makes me feel really bad to have Pete’s passing open my eyes and help remind me of the kids and adults I know who have dealt/are currently dealing with their own losses and battles with cancer. I know its been in the back of my mind when I hear or talk about the marathon, LLS, people affected, etc. I’ve had a friend who just finished chemo for testicular cancer, and it was a surreal thing to hear about it since there’s less associated danger or anything and he would constantly be a part of a post-college list serve we are both a part of, and I really never associated too much with the TNT/LLS cause to his experience. In terms of other recently diagnosed people, I’ve felt for them or family members, but this recent passing has hit me. Maybe it’s the fact that I saw Pete around in college and he was my age and a healthy kid always smiling, and the fact that I’m friends with some of his good friends. I just don’t really know. Its hard to say “now I have a reason to run” because that’s just not the only case, but his experience and what my friends are dealing with (from this case and other cases) means a lot to me now. Its helped me see things in a different way. I know its tough for my friends, and I’m glad they are strong, good people. There’s nothing that I will be able to say to really make anyone feel better, but a lot of people are in my thoughts and I guess I want to let them know (indirectly) that I care about them and I’m sorry.

I’m sorry if this is sad, this blog has generally been very happy and has tracked the progress of running and fun fund raising events, but I felt compelled to write. I still don’t know how to react, or how appropriate it is for me to write when so many other people have been affected a lot worse. I think I just wanted to get something down without holding things in as I usually do and hope that other people are able to deal with things in their own way knowing they have friends around them.

"But it was the most pleasant exhaustion I have ever known."

Wow! First of all, I just want to say a HUGE thank you to everyone for being so incredibly supportive. It was amazing to have all of the friends and fellow TNTers out there on the course on Saturday. Thank you Chris, Lena, Brian, Brandon, Ashwin, Jess, Annie, Joey, Jonah, Jedi's mom, Coach Charlie ... and anyone and everyone else who was there that I have left off. Seeing friendly faces and hearing familiar voices was definitely a comfort during those many miles! As I've said several times before, my experience training for (and now running) this marathon with TNT was absolutely amazing -- I've been so fortunate to have met such wonderful people.

Congrats Crystal! You did it!! You should be so proud of yourself. And congrats to all of the other TNT participants who completed their events this weekend! (Chris didn't mention it, but he ran an amazing half marathon in Virginia Beach this past Sunday.) High fives all around.

I must say, I felt a great sense of accomplishment crossing the finish line. Not only did I prove to myself that I was capable of running 26.2 miles, but I also managed to meet my own personal time goal. Sweet! I don't think I could have asked for a better first marathon experience. My hips and knees were not too fond of me for a couple days after the race, but they're less sore now, and I have absolutely zero regrets about running that far. In fact, I want to do it again -- and soon!

The day itself was perfect for running: chilly at the start, but gorgeous once the sun came up. I think the fact that I was cold before the gun went off helped to calm my nerves a bit (I was too excited about getting warm to be nervous about the race!). Working my way up the pacing groups was also exciting, as I had to start further back in the pack than I had originally planned. (I suppose that's what I get for making one last trip to the bathroom ...). It was nice bumping into fellow runners Barry and Tricia, especially since we got to run with one another for a couple miles at a time. Thanks for keeping me going guys! I'll admit, the run through Anacostia was everything I had heard it would be. To put it simply, it was lonely and painfully long. But once I saw mile marker 24, I was rejuvinated. Ok, so maybe my leg muscles didn't feel fantastic ... but my spirits were certainly raised. I found myself saying out loud, "Just keep running. Don't stop, just keep running. You can do this." And as insane as I felt doing that, I honestly think it was completely necessary. I did stop to walk briefly a few times toward the end -- my legs just didn't want to keep going. Thank goodness for those random runners who shouted, "You can do it purple! You're almost there! Keep going!" I know you'll probably never read this, but thank you so much!

I could go on and on ... when you spend that amount of time running, there is a lot to reflect on. I won't bore you. I just want to say that I am so excited for everyone else who still has their marathon coming up! It will be amazing. Everyone will do great!

Once again, thank you all SO much for the kind words and support. Running this marathon with TNT has been even better than I thought it would. I have been inspired to do many more events in the future. I'm hoping to even continue training and possibly run in Nashville at the end of April ... so maybe I'll see you guys back on the trail! Now, off to my first run since Saturday ... :-).

Congratulations!

I want to express a massive congratulations to Crystal and Jessie (and all the Team in Training runners!) for their finishing the Suntrust National Marathon on Saturday morning in DC.

I spent some time watching the chilly, early miles around Dupont Circle where the pack was especially crowded before wandering over to the runners' second lap down Constitution Ave where the bunches had thinned out. There I joined some fellow TNT members at mile 17 handing out water, Powerade and as much encouragement as possible to lift everyone going into the later stages of the race.

It was inspiring to see how strong most people looked - I even saw a few smiles - so far into their run, and great to see groups of TNT runners together with Jessie, Barry and Trish going by in a pack and Crystal joined by Ashwin, Brian and Lena, who were getting in some training.

By the time I made it over to the finish at RFK, Mayor Fenty was just finishing up (at 3:25!). Watching runner after runner come across the line in exhausted joy only made me want my own race to arrive sooner.

While a few of our group are now finished their TNT event, the rest of us continue to train for Nashville in about a month. We're putting in a shorter run this weekend before ratcheting up to 20 miles next week.

Lastly, if you have a moment, please leave a note congratulating Crystal and Jessie on an awesome accomplishment, and we'll hopefully hear from them personally when they've overcome exhaustion and soreness!

I'm a First-Timer and Can't Wait till this is Over.

Here's a 'real-person' perspective.  I am not a runner.  I actually kinda hate it (although have grown to appreciate it).  I've had multiple aches and pains - I'm 5ft4 with shorter legs and I'm Korean-American - not a long-legged, lean Eastern European or Kenyan.  I'm so nervous about tomorrow I haven't slept well the entire week and I am not only constantly queasy in the stomach, but I have given myself a full-blown tension headache.  Although I appreciate all the wonderful motivational emails, texts, messages...to be honest I haven't read a single damn one because it makes me even more nervous.  Those who know me, I rarely get nervous or embarrassed whether it is job interviews, falling on the street, exams (except for Prof. Dunn's ECON 11 test), talking to boys/men, doing the long runs during training - it's all carpe diem and having fun.  I'm not sure why I'm so nervous - I think it's because I know it's going to be utterly painful and long and I refuse to fail.  

BUT, here is why/how I am going to finish 26.2 miles, no matter what.

The Mission: I really believe in the cause (LLS) and no way is the pain I'm going to feel tomorrow is even minutely comparable to the pain and suffering that victims of Leukemia & Lymphoma have gone through.  This cause is worth every single mile and I truly believe that every mile I finish, is another mile supporting the cause.

Training: I never missed a long run (except one day when I had my qualifying race) and by text  book standards, I am physically ready.

The Team: TNT has been utterly amazing.  I've made so many wonderful friends and been so inspired by all of you.  Special thanks to Coach Charlie, Mickey, my injured Jess, and Caitlin Brown.  Special shout-outs to Capt. Scott, Sarah 'Sprinkles', Fun Sam, Laura who I convinced to switch to a full-marathon and is doing it SO WELL(!), Barry 'Big Bird' Miller, Joe/Capt.America/Jedi, Margo, all the water-stop volunteers, and the rest of the wonderful, WONDERFUL TNTers. Go Team!

Family: my parents, sister, grandparents, multiple aunts, uncles, & cousins  - they are just always so awesome and I am very blessed.

Friends: my friends are the sh*t.  They haven't tempted me too much to go out on Fridays and understand when I'm being lame.  They've donated, come to events, ran with me on some mornings, and give overall support.  Thank you all.  Special thanks to Joey, Francesca, Jackie, Erin & Dan Starck (who not only have ran with me in training but will run with me tomorrow), Diana, and all the rest of you. You know who you are.

SPHR: you make my work days more than bearable and can't express how much I appreciate all the support.  

The Group of 8 that's really 7: I was hesitant in joining way back in November/December when we were at that first info session at the Cleveland Park Library.  Brandon, Ashwin, Brian, Lena, Jessie, and Chris -  You are not only among my closest friends but without you guys, no way would I have ever signed up, been sober on Friday nights, complete the long runs, enjoy brunch at Fado's, finish my fundraising, dance on Saturday nights, and most of all, have FUN during this journey.  Jessie, you are going to absolutely KILL this tomorrow, and the rest of you - I am going to be your LOUDEST and MOST OBNOXIOUS cheerleader in Nashville.  Would it be corny to say that I love you?

Alright - peace and GOOD LUCK to all the National and Shamrock Runners!!

Last Run / 18 miler

Jessie and I had our last training run on Saturday.  I'm very nauseous thinking about the race Saturday but I'll write more about the EVENT later.  Brandon and Chris completed the 18 miler courageously (through various aches and pains) on Saturday while Brian and Lena killed theirs on Sunday.  Here's a photo of frost in B.Lee's hair post-run.

And here's a video clip of injured teammate (who's amazing) Jess and our equally amazing staff coordinator Caitlin.

Words of Inspiration?

Within the last couple of days, I've experienced a lot of different emotions about this upcoming race. I have been re-inspired by the cause, I have been excited about the sense of accomplishment we'll have when we finish, and I have been absolutely terrified by the distance we will be covering. Although I realize that this mix is normal -- particularly for someone who is running her first marathon -- I think I'd rather skip the butterflies and get to the starting line.

Or would I?

As I was reading through the various TNT emails of inspirational quotations today, I remembered a gift I had received my senior year of high school. Three of my track coaches had generously given me a book titled The Quotable Runner: Great Moments of Wisdom, Inspiration, Wrongheadedness, and Humor. Having tucked it away after my most recent move and totally forgotten about it until earlier this evening, I found it among the other books on my dresser. I picked it up and leafed through the table of contents. Page 173 -- The Marathon. Perhaps this would be a good place to look for some relief from the confusion.

What I found, however, was not quite what I expected. What I had expected (perhaps stupidly) was to find a plethora of quotations about how great running a marathon is ... about how awesome we'll feel when we finally cross the finish line ... about how it'll be totally worth the pain. Now, I won't say the positive vibes were totally nonexistent (I've included a few examples at the end of this post), but they certainly weren't overwhelming. Basically, the vast majority of the quotations made me realize that this race is going to hurt -- REALLY hurt. But you know what? I've realized that I'm okay with that.

I've decided that maybe the butterflies and the anticipation, the nausea and the pain, are not only parts of the package, but they're parts we should enjoy. Call me weird, but that's the realization I've come to. If it didn't hurt so badly, would we be as determined or inspired to give it our all? Maybe. But I don't think so. At least I don't think I would be. After all, I absolutely hated running the 400m during my track days. Every single race, the last 100m felt like I was running in quicksand and I couldn't breathe when I crossed the finish. Or how about going to penalty kicks at the end of a double-overtime final of a soccer tournament that marked the tenth game we'd played in 8 days? That definitely didn't feel great either. But I'm pretty sure those games and races wouldn't have been nearly as fulfilling if they had been painless and easy.

So, even though I was initially taken aback by the lack of enthusiasm in these tidbits of "wisdom" and "inspiration", I have come to terms with the fact that -- despite their negativity -- they are actually inspirational to me. Yes, we may feel like throwing up for a week before the race. And, yes, we may feel like we have been hit by a truck for days afterward. But I'm going to try to savor every bit of the experience, and I am going to be so incredibly proud of all of us when we've accomplished our goal. Heck, I'm already proud. We're doing this for a great cause. We've worked so hard to get where we are. It's going to be extremely tough, but it's going to be awesome.

Below are some of the quotations that I found in the book. I thought these were a good mix of the realistic and the optimistic. Thanks again to Coach Morris, Coach Babb, and Coach Alexander for the gift. Go Team!

"The marathon is a charismatic event. It has everything. It has drama. It has competition. It has camaraderie. It has heroism. Every jogger can't dream of being an Olympic champion, but he can dream of finishing a marathon." --Fred Lebow

"The marathon's about being in contention over the last 10k. That's when it's about what you have in your core. You have run all the strength, all the superficial fitness out of yourself, and it really comes down to what's left inside you. To be able to draw deep and pull something out of yourself is one of the most tremendous things about the marathon." --Rob de Castella

"I was unable to walk for a whole week after that, so much did the race take out of me. But it was the most pleasant exhaustion I have ever known." --Emil Zatopek's description of the Olympic Marathon win in Helsinki